Struggling with having interesting conversations? Try this.

Sometimes it seems inevitable - those awkward quiet moments during a conversation. Suddenly there's silence, and neither of you knows what to say or get the conversation started or going properly. Of course, this can happen to even the best of people, but it's inconvenient when you're for example trying to sell something, when you are in love and trying to build a relationship with a certain person, or when you simply want to start a new friendship. Fortunately, this can be fixed! You just need to know how. That's why I decided to create this video, because there are a few techniques you can use which will make sure you WILL HAVE those interesting conversations you always wanted to have! So, what to do? Which techniques do I mean? 

Ask questions

The first one might sound obvious, but I do want to mention it: ASK QUESTIONS. Asking questions is a great way to start and sustain a conversation, and also to revive a conversation when things start to slow down. Just simple questions like "How are you? What do you do for a living? Where do you live?" and some more stuff like that. 

If you don't feel comfortable with that yet, practice it with people you know. You probably already know the basics about them, but you can still ask simple questions about how their day went and maybe ask some more substantive questions about their work. Knowing them may also make you feel less hesitant about asking questions, and if you keep practicing this, you'll find yourself having a good chat before you know it!

When you feel comfortable doing this with people you don't know very well, go for it! There is nothing to be afraid of. We are all human, we are all our authentic selves, each with our own story. And when you get to know someone better, you can start asking some more interesting questions with more depth. For example, you can ask what the biggest challenges in their lives have been and how they have dealt with them, or you can ask about their ambitions and what they have done to get to where they are today and eventually, just say what's on your mind, and this is the next technique I want to talk with you about.

Say what's on your mind

By this, I don't mean that you should say something without thinking, but more that you should not filter. Of course, you shouldn't say ugly things or talk an ugly way. After all, we're trying to get an interesting conversation here! And I think if you'd stop filtering and when you're strong enough to say what's on your mind, without being afraid to be judged by the other, a conversation can go into an interesting direction!

Listen!

And ok, what I'm about to say now might sound logical as well, but actually LISTENING to someone can lead to very interesting conversations. With the attention span most of us have today, this seems incredibly hard, but trust me, it's worth trying! If you want to have a good and interesting conversation, you also have to be a good listener. When I'm talking to someone, I'd rather talk to someone who at least looks like they're interested in what I have to say, and I feel like that person is actually listening to me, than someone who looks bored and uninterested and is definitely not listening to what I'm saying. As you listen, you can develop the conversation and ask good questions so that the conversation can reach levels that may surprise you both. 

Speak clearly and be clear

And last but not least, speak clearly and be clear. To me, personally, when someone is mumbling, or rushing through their words and speak vaguely - it's a conversation-breaker. Be clear, speak clearly, use interesting metaphors and show some enthusiasm. Those points make a conversation far more interesting!